It's Been a Crazy Month!!

 It's been a month since I've gotten a chance to post an update here. Man, it's been a crazy one! In the last month, we've put offers in on four different houses. Two of those houses were bought from underneath us and one of them our offer was rejected. The fourth one might be THE ONE! Our offer was accepted and the house inspection looked GREAT. The termite inspection is tomorrow afternoon. Keep your fingers crossed for us!

We've had three fundraisers that were very successful! The rummage sale raised over $700! Dealicious Cakes' gift certificate sales raised $100! Kim's Peanut Gallery's auction raised over $200!! We still have a few more ideas that we're trying to plan out and schedule. We're really looking forward to them.

Edit: Oh! Our puzzle has also raised $360!

We've both been really busy and we're hoping that everything goes as planned and we close on the house December 20th, or sooner. (Ideally, I'm hoping for the 13th.) This will give us a chance to settle for Christmas and the new year. Then January will bring last minute preparation before getting our home study completed!

Before I began this blog, I had another blog. I really miss blogging about all the happenings in life so there's a very good chance that soon this blog will not just house our adoption updates. Hope you all don't mind. ;)

Adding A Piece to Our Puzzle

Brace yourself. Unless you've researched adoption before, the number I'm about to share might make you fall over. Even though we knew the ball park estimate, the actual number still shocked us a little bit.

The adoption fees, agency fees, medical expenses, and legal fees will be around $34,000. In order to help us lighten the load of this amount, we're planning on doing several fundraisers. One of our planned fundraisers is a puzzle fundraiser. People who would like to participate in this fundraiser will "sponsor" a puzzle piece. The cost of a puzzle piece is $10. Once you purchase your piece, we will write your name on the back of the piece. As pieces are sponsored, it will be put together. Once the puzzle is complete, it will be put into a double sided frame and hung in the baby's nursery.

Originally I was going to post a photo of the puzzle we'd be putting together. I think it's much more fun if everyone has to wait until it's put together. ;)

How to Sponsor a Piece:

-Click on the Donate button in the sidebar and pay securely through PayPal. You do not have to have a PayPal account to do so. :)
- Write a check or donate cash and hand deliver to myself or Dustin
- Mail a check to us. (You can email us at looking4ourmissingpiece@gmail.com for our address)

(Since our letters have gone out and the blog has "gone public", we've have several people let us know that PayPal wasn't working the way it should be. If you have a PayPal account, you can send any donation to maddielynn321@gmail.com. I'm sorry for the issue. We're working to resolve it!)

We're so incredibly thankful for everyone's sweet words and loving support. You all are absolutely wonderful!

"September-ish"

There has been a slight change in plans!

Dustin and I had a conversation about some of our fundraising options and our thoughts on them this weekend. When our support letter came up, Dustin mentioned that he'd like to send them out "September-ish."

WOOOHOOOO! I'm so ready to come out publicly with our choice to adopt. Hearing this was music to my ears. I guess I need to get on collecting those addresses!

Our Support Letter.

If we have your mailing address, be on the watch out. This is the letter we will be sending out asking for your love, support, thoughts, and prayers during this journey. It's going to be a very long (and stressful) journey but we know it will be wellll worth it in the end. We also know we're incredibly lucky to be surrounded by so many amazing people.

Dustin and I have decided on October 1st as the day they'll be going out. I've been trying to decide if I want to include a photo in them. If so, would I include something we already have? Or get with one of the photographers we know and get a new one? Any thoughts?

Dear Friends and Family,

            From the first time we began discussing a future, Dustin and I saw kids in our future.  During different times through our relationship the “ideal” number bounced back and forth between two and four.  Our journey to begin a family has definitely been less than ideal. Some of you know the general details of our struggle over the past three years, including our losses.

            After our fourth and most recent loss, we began looking into other options.  The difficulties getting pregnant, the fight to stay pregnant, and the devastation after a loss is simply too much to bear at this time.  We have decided to begin the adoption process!  We didn’t come to this decision lightly though.  Much research has been done.  Many, many prayers have been said.  We are very excited to where this will take us.  We are writing this letter asking for support.

            First, we ask that you keep us, and this adventure we’re about to set out on, in your prayers.  We have wanted to start a family for some time now and know that God has the perfect child for us out there.  Also, please pray for the family we will be working with.  We know the decision to place their child for adoption will not be an easy one to make.

            Secondly, we humbly ask for financial support.  Domestic infant adoption is very expensive.  I am now a consultant with Thirty One and my commissions are being set aside.  We hope to watch God bless my business.  Several fundraisers have been discussed and are in the planning stage.  If you’d be interested in supporting us financially or in the fundraisers being planned, please feel free to contact us! We would love to hear from you!

            Our road to adopting a baby has only just begun.  We have met with an adoption agency.  By the end of the January or February, we hope to be an “active” family for birth families to choose from.  Although this is a long process, we are extremely excited about what is to come.

            I plan to blog as a way to document our journey.  If you would like to follow us or would prefer email updates, please let us know.  Thank you so much for your prayers and support!

With love,

Dustin & Maddie
looking4ourmissingpiece@gmail.com

October 1st.

That's is the day that our support letters are going into the mail and that we will come out publicly with our plans to adopt. The days are dragging. People ask how we're doing and if we're going to start trying again soon and I just want to open my big mouth about our next adventure. I'm ready to send those letters out yesterday. It doesn't help that they are all finished. I'm currently collecting addresses. I'm playing with the idea of including a photo of the two of us, but I'm not sure if that's just too cheesy. At least I have time to decide!

Let's hope August and September go by as quickly as the rest of the year has.

Domestic Infant Adoption.

There are many different types of adoption programs. Dustin and I have decided to pursue domestic infant adoption. (DIA) Like most, it's a long process. Here's some of what we have ahead of us:

• Applications
• An orientation session
• Lots and lots and lots of paperwork
• An adoption readiness seminar
• Complete a Home Study
• Introductory Letter (or a "Dear Birth Family" letter)
• Waiting, waiting, and possibly more waiting

Once we're matched, that's not all. Then we look forward to:

• Placement
• Post-placement supervision
• Finalization in court

I plan to blog as much as I can about the process but we'll definitely have slow times that we're just waiting for something. We look forward to sharing our journey with you!

Why Adoption?

Adoption is an interesting topic. People don't know a lot about it the process, the different options or much of what it entails at all, other than an adoptive family is paired up with a birth family who can't parent for some reason. People have mixed feelings about it as well. It seems that most have a pretty positive outlook on it but there are people that believe are very selfish in their hope to adopt instead of alternatives.

Some people believe adoption is an incredibly selfless act. People think that the adoptive parents are "saving" the child and giving it something he or she wouldn't have otherwise. This isn't (at all) the reason we've chosen adoption. We've chosen adoption because we want, desperately, to start a family. In the two years between our last two pregnancies, adoption crossed my mind frequently. When I thought about, I felt such a tug at my heart. I mostly just pushed those feelings aside, as we were both determined to get pregnant on our own. We both very much wanted to experience a successful pregnancy. At our first appointment for our 4th pregnancy, things didn't look so good and we ended up in a state of limbo. At this point, adoption started creeping back into my head. The tug and ache at my heart returned. After it was confirmed that we were losing another baby, I knew we would be adopting.

Our doctor reminded us that there wasn't anything stopping us from trying again, on our own, or with a fertility intervention. Nothing had come back abnormal in the many tests that had been performed. It didn't matter. Adoption would be our next step.

When people say that we're "saving" a child, it makes us out to be some kind of a saint. We're not. If some mentions how lucky a child is to be adopted, they are wrong. So often it's the PARENTS who are lucky to have that child. To be given the chance to love and nurture it. To be chosen by the birth family to step in and taken on the roles of mom and dad. That's a blessing to the adoptive parents. I hope and pray that we will be blessed with a child. I would feel SO incredibly lucky to be chosen.